Wow. So I remember liking young justice a long time ago, but it had literally been over a decade since I had read one of the books, and it’s super obvious it’s written for 13 year olds. And I’m dubious about how good that even is. It’s pretty obvious I liked the idea of Young Justice more than the book itself, which wasn’t uncommon for a younger me. The book, written by Peter David, attempts to be hip, cool, and self-aware. It fails at all of them. It’s a grown man writing children and it’s bad. It’s not even funny in the ‘I know this sounds bad but I hate teenagers so this is intentionally bad’ sort of way. It’s just not good.
But poor dialogue in a super hero book is forgivable. Most super hero books have poor dialogue. We haven’t cracked the code on that just yet. But the story is just. Like. It’s almost boring at this point to talk about misogyny in super hero comics, but here we are. The book is just fucking gross. So the first ‘villain’ we meet is an archaeologist who finds an ancient scooter that gives her giant boobs. And the rest of that first issue is just talking about her boobs. And she goes on some screed against men in a way to let you know that this book absolutely hates women. It’s the conflating of anatomy with sexuality and punishing the assumed sexuality from anatomy. The jokes don’t hold up at all either. The harem we get to near the end of the book is, again, not funny. The goggling at women by our heroes is predictable and boring.
And all of this is before we introduce a single girl to the team. It’s just boys. They know it and to address this they end one issue by saying the next issue is the one with girls in. And how does it start? Violence against this girl. Oh sure, they don’t mean anything by it. The tone goes from bad jokes to serious cape comics in a hurry, and it’s poorly done. Wonder girl is in love with Superboy, and that seems to be her only motivation here. There’s a crappy love triangle. The first brown kids we meet are in an experimental facility and they don’t get to leave or be part of any cool team. The villain is brown and his father kills him by shooting him and we get to see that in all it’s graphic glory. Like, there really isn’t much redeemable about this book. I forgot about the catfight between Arrowette and Wonder Girl’s mothers.
The only think I like about Young Justice are the character designs, but those came in into existence outside of this title. Wonder Girl and Superboy have never had better getups. Arrowette is stupid and I can’t tell one bodysuit robin from the next. Really it’s just leather jackets, sick glasses, and bad haircuts that I have a soft spot for. This book will go.